In case you have begun your winter hibernation and haven’t been on the internet in the past week, (1) good for you and (2) you probably missed the best viral video in history. Truly, Dakota Johnson and Ellen DeGeneres’s hilariously awkward discussion about birthday party invites put me six feet under. IDK if any of us can ever recover from Dakota absolutely owning Ellen on her own talk show. And now, body-language expert Blanca Cobb is here to break down what Ellen’s and Dakota’s body language said that they didn’t.
If you didn’t watch the video yet or just want another recap so you can laugh all over again, I’m happy to oblige. When Dakota went on The Ellen DeGeneres Show recently, Ellen decided to rag on Dakota about why she didn’t invite her to her 30th birthday party in October. Without letting the host get too far into her supposed fairy tales, Dakota shut that down and was basically like, “Cut the cameras.” JK, but it did seem like the actress was ready to metaphorically throw hands. Ellen was not ready.
(BTW, Ellen was invited and just didn’t go. Many people are speculating that it was because she was hanging out with George W. Bush at a football game.) But let’s take a closer look at what their body language said, shall we?
Ellen’s Nervous Fingers and Crossed Legs
From the jump, Cobb said Ellen was totally uncomfortable. She pointed out the importance of how Ellen was sitting and explained to Cosmo, “So the right leg is crossed over her left leg, and that leg—the way she has it—serves like a barrier between her and Dakota, so it’s like a psychological barrier as well as a physical barrier.”
Even more awkward, Cobb noted that Ellen was “rubbing her fingers either on the armrest or on the leg,” which means she’s “self-soothing.”
Dakota’s Comfortable Lean
As for Dakota, Cobb said she started out feeling comfortable and leaning toward Ellen. And when Dakota explained she didn’t invite Ellen to her party last year because she didn’t think the comedian liked her, Dakota’s palms were up, showing she was being “sincere, candid, and forward.”
Ellen’s Facial Expression
Ellen then countered that and was like, “Of course I like you. You knew I liked you! You’ve been on the show many times and don’t I show...like?” But Cobb noted that it’s weird Ellen didn’t smile when she said that, which is what typically happens when someone says they like someone.
Cobb added, “If you have something positive to say to somebody, you’re going to reflect it on your face. Likewise, when you’re pissed at somebody, you’re going to reflect that on your face. I’m not exactly sure if Ellen was pissed. I think she was a bit surprised.” Eek!
Ellen’s Turned Head
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So, uh, yeah, if you thought Ellen was uncomfortable about the birthday party stuff, that’s apparently nothing compared to how she felt about not being named Dakota Johnson’s favorite comedian. Life’s rough.